it’s really amazing, how many wonderful and amazing friends I have now. I love them. I love being a good friend and I love having good friends in return.

I actually had a lot of crap friends growing up, to be honest…

as you can see from my earlier post about my new glasses….I was not a cool kid. I was a huge dork. and I was kind of weird and annoying too….so. it took a while to learn good-friend-skills and make some good friends.

K & 1st grade:

I had this friend whose Dad happened to be the richest Dad in the WORLD. her house was ginormous. she had all the coolest toys, and a hugemongous secret playroom. the first time I was invited over to her house, she showed me the secret playroom. and it was awesome. until she wanted to play a game called “naked princesses” which involved both of us parading around in our birthday suits. She made me promise not to tell her Mom about it. I really didn’t want to play. so I didn’t. she said she would punch me. I said I’d tell on her. she punched me. I ratted her out. her Mom had the weirdest look on her face and also didn’t seem to think it was a huge deal at the same time. we were still friends after that [because, well, she was my only friend]. I went to her fancy birthday parties. she came to my house once and said “why is your house so SMALL???”

they built a new elementary school that opened for our second grade year. she was in the new school boundaries. I was devastated.

2nd grade [and every other grade]:

this girl was a constant frenemy for the rest of my elementary school days. most of the time she was an enemy, though. one day, I was wearing an undershirt. the strap slipped out. frenemy saw it and said “ARE YOU WEARING A BRA?!?!” I said no, stupid, this is an undershirt. she came over, looked down my shirt, and said “NUH-UH, IT’S A BRA.” and then proceeded to tell the rest of the class very loudly. I cried. and was laughed at for crying. so from then on I decided never to cry in public [a habit I’ve only just barely been getting around to breaking].

another time frenemy asked me why I took so long to go to the bathroom in our portable-trailer classroom. “DID YOU GO NUMBER TWO?!” this was embarrassing in two ways. firstly, I was not familiar with the terms “number one” and “number two” in regards to bowel movements. secondly, she then started whispering to the whole class that I had pooped in the bathroom AND I didn’t know what “number two” meant. she even went back to smell the room and came back with a report that it smelled funny so she must be right even if I was denying it.

for the record, when you gotta go you gotta go! I was mortified because I really hated going #2 ย at school and I really hoped no one would notice.

randomly at recess one day, said frenemy was actually nice to me! she even gave me her phone number and said we should have a sleepover. I called her. she made up excuses about why she couldn’t play. I tried calling her again at a later date, and she stopped answering my calls.

I used to think really mean thoughts about her bottom when I got stuck walking up the stairs behind her. I’m really sorry for that now.

3rd grade:

I made a friend that I thought was super duper!! she was so nice to me, and we played together at recess, and she invited me to her house and she came to mine. her mom was never very nice to me. but we were friends anyway. until one day she stopped letting me play Spice Girls during recess. and stopped talking to me. and never invited me over to her house ever again. I was so absolutely devastated at this betrayal. I cried to my mother about it for weeks months years [and that, my friends, is how I learned to let go of grudges].

we had a PE class together in high school and she was super nice. we were even on the same [really awful] tennis team!

5th&6th grade:

I was part of a friend-triangle. it was dramatic. my two friends were always fighting with each other and I was always trying to keep the peace. then one friend just….stopped being our friend completely. she pretended to ignore me ย in the halls and didn’t want me to have her phone number anymore, which was kind of an “ouch” moment.

the other part of the trio and I remained friends. she is great.

okay…I think I’ll stop now.

I DID have a couple (as in: literally two) very good friends during these years, and I am so grateful for them and appreciate their kindness more than they know ๐Ÿ™‚ and even though being teased growing up was rough, I am grateful for that too.

It made me who I am. It helped me to stop caring about being popular and with the “in” crowd. I stopped caring what people thought of me. I tried my best to be nice to absolutely everyone. I tried to not give people a reason to have problems with me. And for the most part, these habits have stuck ๐Ÿ™‚

even though kids are cruel, even the bullied kids can turn out to be a-okay.

and that is the moral of my story, I guess. [mostly I just kept thinking about these experiences and couldn’t sleep so decided to write it out, yo.]

Love — Rach